On dreams and art

[vr_trakowski]

Last night I dreamed of tidal waves, cliffs, churches, salt and ice, and Dale Midkiff.  Also that I was dreaming, which was disorienting when I thought myself to be awake anyway. 

My latest plot bunny is running in my veins like a virus, and the only thing keeping me from working on it at my lunch break is the fact that if I start I probably won't be able to stop.  Well, that and it's probably going to be NC-17, muse willing, and this is a work computer.  It's not letting me work on PK or anything else, which could be a problem given that I haven't finished the next chapter yet, but I suppose I could take a week off if I had to.  I'm hoping I can get this one done by Sunday, at least in rough draft. 

It's an odd piece.  Much more angsty than I usually do, particularly for this fandom, and it is very defined--I know what's to happen, it's just a matter of getting the characters there.  The thing is, it's full of emotion, and I keep looking at what I've written and wondering where the heck it's all coming from, because I haven't experienced anything remotely like what I'm putting Pepper through.  More so than usual, that is.  

This sort of push from a story is rare, and I love it even as I grumble about it.  I wrote almost three thousand words yesterday, which is more than what I'd push for during NaNoWriMo, and I stopped only because I ran out of time. 

I don't even know if people will like this one, and it'll probably be a while before I post it.  But just to write it is a joy all its own. 

Comments

[cincoflex.livejournal.com]

I know the zone you're talking about and yes, yes, yes, it IS lovely to be driven because the story is *there* and needs to be told, no ifs ands or buts. That's what differentiates writers from other people who write stories or fanfiction--that clarity of purpose and joy in simply doing it!

The story in question is going to be wonderful, angst and all. This, I *know*!

[vr-trakowski.livejournal.com]

I love you for your faith in me! And you're so right--it's its own bliss, in a way. Difficult, but so rewarding.

[mingsmommy.livejournal.com]

You know, if you should need an advanced reader amongst the common people, you know, just to make sure it would be liked, *cough* I'd be happy to do this for you. I am SUCH a giver.

Seriously, how could anything you write not be brilliant? Not possible. Not possible at all. You should get paid to write...I always walk away from one of your stories feeling like I cheated someone somehow...I got this for free? How cool is that?

[vr-trakowski.livejournal.com]

*blush* You're too kind! I do get paid to write, in a sense, but not fiction, alas.

(Sorry about the double PM, the interface wasn't working well.)

[4persephone.livejournal.com]

You certainly have me CURIOUS...but I'm always a sucker for your writing. :-) -Hands you cyber brownies of writing encouragement, and goes back to DLS tweaking-

[vr-trakowski.livejournal.com]

Hopefully this one won't turn stubborn and bog down! Ooh, brownies.

*hopes for more DLS soon!*

[4persephone.livejournal.com]

Well I doubled the size of what I had written before today...

And next scene shoudl be interesting...Tony's about to lure Pepper into a (thankfully in her opinion) adult entertainment shop ;p

[4persephone.livejournal.com]

erk...! A thankfully CLOSED adult novelty store.

-snicker-

[vr-trakowski.livejournal.com]

Heee! Okay, yeah, I can see that! Heck, he should just buy one. :P

[4persephone.livejournal.com]

Right now he's more inclined to let her wander and see what catches her attention ;p

[stargatedragon.livejournal.com]

smut, yeah... that's awful.

:P

I'M WAITING...

:)

[vr-trakowski.livejournal.com]

*snerk* At the risk of a pun, it never comes easy for me...

[stargatedragon.livejournal.com]

*thud*

oh, but it's so GOOD when it does...

;)

[snowydragon1776.livejournal.com]

Yay for writing.

I've had the were did that come from moment (i'm referring to there's no way I experienced any of this remotely myself bit).

The story/book I wrote felt like that - it was defined and I just had to write it. And I totally write for me - that's the fun part :D

[vr-trakowski.livejournal.com]

Yes indeed! One of the small but lovely mysteries of life!

[boubabe14.livejournal.com]

See? That's why I could never be a writer. Even tho' I have these ideas for stories, I just can't make them sound right on paper. I've been trying to get a CSI storyline on paper (well, screen) for months. I can't stop thinking abou the plot but it never manifests itself into actually writing. FLAIL! and FAIL!!

That said, I love your writing, no matter when, where, what, or who I get with it. I'm seriously thinking about printing out Halfway to the Moon for you to autograph when we meet...just 9 days from now!!!!! WOOT!

[vr-trakowski.livejournal.com]

Oh, good heavens! *hides head in couch cushions* It's just fanfic...

Well, yeah, that's the hard part--but everyone who writes feels like they didn't get it right, at least a large part of the time. Sometimes the only way to progress is one stubborn word at a time.

Can hardly wait! :D